Thursday, March 25, 2010

Sunshine & Rain .. Peace & Nightmares

Last weekend I had the most wonderful time with friends in a cabin in North Carolina. Days with shopping the cozy shops in Boone & Blowing Rock, and viewing one of the awesome fresco paintings at Holy Trinity Episcopal Church in Glendale Springs. Nights were listening to the rain & sitting by the fire, cuddling, sharing philosophical thoughts, breathing in the quiet peacefulness.

During that wonderful weekend however, an old demon returned to haunt me .. a recurring nightmare that propels me into a screaming fit in my sleep. I woke up everyone in the cabin before I could get myself awake. Usually that happens when I'm either over-heated or over-stressed, and this time I was neither. I was comfy, felt safe and secure, and was very relaxed. The only explanation I can come up with is an explosive release of residual stress. I suspect I darn near caused a coronary.

If I promise to behave next time, can we go again ?

Please please please.

Holy Father, thank you for the love of friends.
Help me return the love I have so generously been given.

Divine Mother, thank you for the beauty of the mountains.
Help me see your face in both the sunshine and the rain.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Girlie Weekend

I had the wonderful delight of spending time with my sister & niece last weekend. We ran away to a cabin in the mountains of northern Georgia for a 'girlie' weekend. Giggles & shopping, wine & a fire (in the fireplace not the kitchen), cookies & quiet heart-to-heart talks, dancing in pj's & peaceful rest.

During chemo, we had talked about how much we wanted to go to Helen, Ga, but I wasn't sure I would ever have enough energy to do that again, at least not for a very long time. It was amazing.

I still don't have my full strength back, but I seem to be able to tell a difference every week. I have fuzzy hair and eyelashes, I'm making it through the work-day much better, and I've even been able to do a few things after work several days.

I'm rediscovering my faith and seem to be finding a new niche. As bizarre as it sounds, I am a much happier little girl since surgery/chemo.

Life is good. I'm excited about it for the first time in a very long time.

Holy Father, thank you for the refreshing of my spirit.
Blessed Mother, thank you for the calming of my soul.